Sometimes one of the toughest things that you’ll have to manage during your wedding and wedding planning is the mother of the bride and the mother of the groom. Whether it’s your own mother, or your partner’s mother, things can get sticky with everything from picking food and dresses to finding your perfect Arizona wedding venue.

However, there are some simply tricks that you can employ to get through the wedding planning in one piece and not completely disrespect your mother or your partner’s mom.

For the Groom

Ok buys, this section is for you. Wedding planning can be incredibly stressful, not just for your wife-to-be but for the moms on both sides of the aisle. You mother is letting her son go to another woman, and your wife-to-be’s mom is letting her little girl go.

Besides the emotional journey that both moms will be taking while you do everything from find flowers to find your perfect Arizona wedding venue, they will also be helping you do these things, providing input and wanting to be an integral aspect of every single part of the wedding planning. It’s just in their nature.

With stress and emotions running extremely high, and getting high by each passing day as the wedding approaches, you have a role to play to help ease the tension. You might think that you’re singular role is to keep your wife stress-free and help her with whatever she needs as she plans your wedding, but in reality some of the best ways to decrease her stress is to step up for both moms. Here are some ideas:

  • Moms of the groom are usually fearful of ‘losing their sons to the other side,’ afraid that the mother-of-the-bride will become your new mom and that you will now be spending more time with her family then your own. This is an extremely common fear, as many married couples do tend to spend more holidays and time with the wife’s family. It is your responsibility to make your mother feel loved throughout this process. Make sure she knows that she is still your mother, and still one of the most important women in your life.
  • Keep communication between your mom and her mom. They will need to become friends, and like it or not if you can facilitate this friendship, getting them to work together and on the same page you will take some pressure off of your wife-to-be.
  • Keep them involved as much as you can, but out of your wife’s way. Whether you’re doing cake taste-testing, or picking that perfect Arizona wedding venue, make sure you are there with your wife and keeping her front and center, yet still communicating and keeping both moms involved.
  • Keep the peace. Your wife is going to be incredibly busy, stressed and emotionally drained during the wedding planning. It’s your responsibility to keep the peace between both moms so that the stress and distraction does not interfere with your wife’s well being during the wedding planning.
  • Finally, one of your most important roles will be the facilitator of thank you’s and appreciation. Tell each and every person how much you appreciate them being at your wedding. Tell both moms how much you appreciate their help. Make a speech at a rehearsal dinner or family gathering thanking each and every person who has helped make your wedding a reality. And thank both moms in a special way.

Grooms, your role in managing your bride’s stress levels is probably one of the most important roles you’ll take on as the wedding approaches.